Sankofa – You have to look back to go forward

2017 was a year of learning and faith building. I had 3 key ambitions:

1. Clear my debt
2. Buy my flat
3. Pass my UK driving test

It is funny the way life goes, you get so caught up in your life that you miss when you start accomplishing your goals because you are so caught up in them. But as I sit here with about 5 days left of the year I can say I have accomplished all my goals and even that realisation has taken time for me to register it and feel good about myself, proud of myself for getting this done.

I have to say that in all of these goals God was fully present because the challenges and barriers that tried to pop up, internal and external, could have stopped any one of them from happening but I prayed and stepped into true faith – letting God take control and listening to that voice within and doing what the voice says.

I’m going to take this lesson into 2018 so to begin I am going to do this Wheel of Life exercise and see what needs working on!

This is the one I used but there are more, I added spirituality as that is important to me! Here is your own wheel of life to get to work on: SESA Wheel of Life and when you have finished with this on to goal setting SESA Goal Setting template

Fun and Recreation – 4 out of 10

This year I stepped out more and put greater effort into having some fun, meeting up with friends and family, going to places I like (theatre, galleries and restaurants) but I want to do more – I love food but less food related activities going forward would be good. I would like to carve out more time to see friends, family and one on one time with my God-children.

I have allowed myself to become quite lethargic and home body like so I am going to switch off the box sets and back to back series and start using my evenings again.

Career – 5 out of 10

My career has been coasting for one reason and another but that will stop now and I will start giving it the action based attention it needs. This means looking at where I am and being brave enough to fully admit where I want to go. It also means putting in the time to learn what I need to know so I can be who I need to be to make my ambitions happen and follow the path God has carved out for me. On this point I have to say I have been meandering along my life path and accomplished some cool things but I have to say I keep coming back to a particular point on my life path in terms of my purpose and I feel it is time I followed through…it’s time!

Health – 6 out of 10

I feel pretty good but I know I can be a lot better. I have been having concentration and memory problems, feeling sluggish and definitely want to increase my general fitness (damn those stairs mocking me!). I am having a health check tomorrow and then I will know where I stand medically. I already know I have to be more disciplined with my lactose and gluten intolerance because it definitely plays a prominent part in feeling the way I have been feeling. Not to mention making me incredibly bloated!

I am also going to introduce some supplements in my life, research has shown me what I need so let’s see. I am also going to work on developing a health regime that is enjoyable for me so:

• Running appeals to me and setting some distance goals would be good so 5K, 10K here I come and let’s see where we go from there
• Starting a proper gym programme so I can have guidance, focus and someone I am accountable too
• Dancing nicely crosses between health and recreation pole dancing or/and modern dancing yes please

I just want to feel good, awake and agile mentally and physically!

Personal Development – 5 out of 10

Financial knowledge is at the forefront of my mind and I have bought some books in this area, what needs to happen is the focus and discipline to learn it (seeing a theme here right?). I really want to have a clear idea and the ability to run my finances properly and those of others who may need it. I have been playing with the idea of a project management course but the tipping point of commitment hasn’t hit yet.

I have also been doing a lot of meditation, reflection and reading on getting my relationship with me on point. Below are some links to some of my favourites. I do feel they have helped me and so I will continue to use them as part of my self-knowledge and enhancing tools.

• Life purpose meditation
• You can manifest anything
• The Purpose Driven Life – Rick Warren

I still have work to do on my full honesty with those closest to me and to myself I suppose. I also have to work on my anger and irritation thresholds – probably linked with the points just mentioned – toxic emotions and pent up feelings trickle out in negative ways.

Friends and Family – 6 out of 10

I think I have been pretty supportive this year with family and friends and this feels good to me. I think I need to work harder with some as I would like to have/ maintain strong relationships with some people. I want to stop letting the fact that someone hasn’t called or contacted me first or back stop me from seeing or staying in touch with people I care about.

I also want to make new friends this year. Meet people with different interests, knowledge, ways of looking at and being in the world – open my eyes to more.

Environment – 5 out of 10

This is an interesting one. I am in London which I like (for now) but know I want to do more with this city I call home. I am blessed to be able to live where I live and that is the thing I have to think about – am I ready to make my home a home or am I going to continue to save and wait for the ‘right time’. Even writing that provides my answer, there is no ‘right’ time there is now and so what is the best thing for me right now?

At some point this year I would like to go and stay in Ghana for maybe a month and see what is going on there and whether there is a place for me in the mix, we’ll see.

Finance – 7 out of 10

I think this may be the first time that my finances do not cause me anxiety or palpitations. I am developing a healthy relationship with money, saving and the ‘importance’ of money in life. This year showed me that money has allowed me to help and support those I care about but God’s currency, my time and attention, has a very high value as well and I must not get them confused and fall in the trap of thinking money is the answer to everything, because it provides part of the answer but is generally not the full solution!

Romance/ Significant Other – 2 out of 10

To be honest even that 2 is hella generous!!! I have played with some online/ app type sites and gone on some dates. I met some very nice people but there was no spark, no excitement and most importantly no in-depth connection. I know it is not just them I have a part to play for sure. Part of my self-development has been looking at my behaviour towards relationships, men, love and I can feel I am getting closer to break through. I have been carrying some stuff that I needed to address head on and resolve, I am going through that as I type so we’ll see where I am on the other side.

This is an area that is important to me and I honestly do want a romantic significant other, marriage, children and all that having a family means, so I have to do my part to help this happen.

This meditation has been interesting on finding your partner.

Spirituality – 8 out of 10

I feel I have been open to the presence and voice of God very much this year. I don’t always understand what or why the things that happen have happened but in all the things good has always come out of it. For my continued growth and relationship with God I will commit to Hillsong. This makes me feel a bit nervous which lets me know this is the path for me. In fact with all things if it makes me nervous or uncomfortable I know it is something I have to step into with faith, trust and love.

And so….

The life cycle was a helpful exercise actually, glad I did it and am sharing it with you. I am going to keep my goals to myself for now and maybe mid-year or this time next year I’ll let you know how far I got. I wish you a 2018 that makes you feel that you have grown, achieved some things, learnt some things and you are better for it. Just remember what you think you want may not be what you are supposed to have right now. Try not to overlook what you do accomplish because it wasn’t part of your plan, there are bigger plans in the works.